Let me start by saying that I don't believe that spanking a child is always wrong. I do believe that it should be one of the last options for a serious infraction. I also believe that you should never hit your children when you are angry. That does not mean that you shouldn't discipline your child. There are many ways to discipline your child
Links on discipline:
10 Alternatives to Spanking
Christain Parent
Family Education
Discipline Without Distress: 135 tools for raising caring, responsible children without time-out, spanking, punishment or bribery
What would you do?
Imagine that on the way to running some errands you decided to stop by a friend’s house. Your friend was so happy that you stopped by and I you have a seat in the living room. She runs upstairs and starts cussing out her three children telling them they need to clean their rooms before they can go outside. You feel uncomfortable but try to make lighten the mood by cracking a joke. After a few minutes one of the kids comes down stairs and says that they lost their library book. Your friend yells," I told you to keep up with your things. Get the belt." The boy about 8 years old hesitates but hands a leather belt to his mom and hold out his hand. With a loud, "WHAPPP!" she hits his hand three times and tells him to clean up until he can find his book.
What would you do in that situation? What advice would you give if someone asked you to help them find alternatives to spanking?
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3 comments:
I personally have looked for alternatives to spanking and right now, redirection is working well. If I had a friend that was spanking their child out of frustration, I would not address it at that direct moment. I would wait until later after things have calmed down and address it then. I would share with them some of the tips that I have learned. When talking to someone about the way they discipline their child, it's important not to seem like you are talking down to them or condemning them. The way we discipline our children is often the result of how we were disciplined as children. Good post!
Interestingly enough, an old teacher told my class about how his children were punished. (He was a Christian man) He believed in spanking, but he waited until he was not angry, frustrated or annoyed. He would then talk to his child and discuss what they did wrong and how it could be fixed, and then he spanked them. It wasn't damaging because he was completely calm. It was a different light for me to see punishment in.
The thought of being in that situation makes me physically ill. I would not be able to stand there and let that happen. Totally unreasonable and wrong way to teach or punish behaviour.
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